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I was working as a secretary in a college Athletic Department when a position opened in the Music Department and I was given an opportunity to fill it.  I felt much more suited for the Music Department. I don’t even read the sports page of the newspaper! 

My boss and I had been good friends at one time - until I set a particular boundary that offended her.  After that she made a point of being the boss and my being the secretary, sticking to business only.  When I told her I would like to transfer to the Music Department, she bombarded me with indignation saying that my quitting in the middle of the year was unethical and unprofessional.  I was very hurt and angry about her accusations - especially because she knew me well enough to know that if she had just said she needed me to finish the school year or the season, I would have felt needed and been happy to stay.  She was a licensed counselor and knew exactly what she was doing when she decided to make me feel guilty.  It was a calculated move and it made me furious, but it worked.  I stayed.

However, I was so angry I could hardly function in my job.  Each time I saw her I shot her furious looks.  I couldn’t sleep at night. I just kept rehashing the wrong against me.  I was shocked at the garbage that was stewing in me.  I really didn’t think I was capable of such ugly thoughts.  I thought I had more Christian maturity than that.  After several days of hot anger, I went to the personnel office in desperation, wanting to know how to keep working for someone for whom I had lost respect.  I just didn’t think I could do it unless God helped me.  The personnel manager sympathized (knowing my boss’s reputation) and prayed with me and we agreed to give God more time to work.

As I walked home, I cried out to God, Where is the grace to forgive?  I thought that as a Christian I would have the grace to turn the other cheek when wrongly accused.  Where was it?  And then a phrase started running through my mind.  I knew it was in the Bible, but where?  “God gives grace to the humble . . .”

As soon as I got home I grabbed the concordance to find the rest of the verse. There it was in I Peter.  “God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble.  Submit therefore to God.  Resist the devil and he will flee from you.  Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.  Be miserable and mourn and weep; let your laughter be turned into mourning, and your joy to gloom.  Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you.”

Suddenly I saw that my response to the wrong done to me and my pride was just as ugly in God’s sight as my boss’s manipulation.  Immediately, as I confessed my anger and self-justification, grace came pouring in like a flood and to my great surprise all the anger dissipated.  Mourning over my sin led to the Lord filling me with joy.  I ran to the phone and called the personnel manager to tell her the good news.  Our prayer had been answered already!  She was as surprised as I was.

The next day when I went to work I actually felt like hugging my boss when she came into the room even though she never acknowledged doing anything wrong.  I apologized for my behavior and attitude to the other secretaries in the office, two friends of mine.

I ended up working for that boss for another year and a half without any conflict.  Then, that summer there was another opening in the Music Department and I transferred with my boss’s blessing. 

Where was the grace to be found that God promised?  In laying aside my pride and humbling myself.  Right where He said it would be.

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